DOWN.

Ya Allah.

I will never get mad each time you plan for me to fall sick.

But I only ask for you to forgive my sins... That you wash away my sins as big as the ocean or bigger than the universe when you later take away my sickness.

Allahumma Ameen!

SCREAMS.

I don't feel like crying.

I just want to cry.

URGE.

I wished to be able to talk to you. Badly.

But either our paths don't cross. 

Or Allah gave me low courage to walk up to you or even look up to you for an acknowledgement.

I wished to be your friend. Badly.

But either you don't want to.

Or Allah does not plan for us to be friends.

I wished to see you. Badly.

But either our work/school shifts doesn't clash.

Or when I do, it's just a hallucination of you. (Or maybe it was you?)

I know. I have a crush. Every right reasons for me to admire someone, there is still half of me holding strong to my low self-esteem.

But for every right reasons that I don't want to approach him, talk to him, look and smile at him, I really do pray that Allah will reward me for it. 

May Allah grant me a pious, righteous, and patient (lol) husband for me. Allahumma Ameen!

M.