It's currently 1600hrs Singapore time. Underneath a block at a void deck nearby my house. Accompanied by the thunder, lightning and it's raining cats & dogs. Current mood: Upset, hurt, emotional.
Just that this time, I'm no longer sure if it's PMS (again). I can't keep using PMS as an excuse for my emotional and/or scary moodswings and my menses din even give signs of coming. Maybe I just don't want to accept the fact that I'm not an easy person to handle or be with. That I'm not a happy & fun individual. That I'm an extremely sensitive person.
(Even while typing this I'm thinking of what if I happened to see someone I know passed by? And what if they ask me what am I doing here? Think I would just burst out coz that's how much I needed someone here with me badly.)
What concerns me is... What makes me so emotional? Why am I so sensitive? Issit so bad? Is this getting from bad to worst? Maybe if I can figure out the answers by myself I'll be able to handle my moodswings and sensitivity better. Or perhaps if I ever have to think about sad thoughts, I'll most probably encourage myself to think positive.
I'm currently in need of a companion who can hear me out, be there when I need him/her and just be him/herself.
If only........................
Hurt, sad and lonely,
M.
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